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Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Day 81- Ella's Half Birthday

For some reason about a week ago, Ella asked me when she would be 4 and a half. Then, she started asking everyday how many more "nigh nights" were left before her half birthday. She was so excited this morning when she woke up that TODAY was her half birthday. We made cupcakes and bug shaped brownies to celebrate the occasion.
As an adult way over the big 3 O you couldn't catch me celebrating a half birthday of my own. But for a kid birthdays, even half birthdays, are such a landmark. They show how much they have grown both physically and emotionally. When she got excited about a half birthday, I kinda did too. I also got grateful. Grateful that she is celebrating her half birthday. Grateful that she is still here. Grateful that for now, she is happy, has good energy, and is smiling everyday. I also realize how much she has changed and grown over the past 81 days. How much her little body has endured, and what an example of strength she is not just to us, but to people we do not know. Friends of friends who have given gifts, cards, and even their own blood because our child is strong enough to endure this journey.

To those of you I know, and even those I do not- thank you for all your encouraging words, cards, gifts, and blood! Thank you for following Ella on this journey and offering you prayers.

Joshua will be celebrating his 7th Birthday this weekend, and you will never guess what kind of party he is having........a Karate Party. He seemed mad today that Ella was having a half birthday. When I asked him he said he was feeling left out. I didn't, and still don't know how to reconcile this with him. I didn't know who to make him understand that celebrating Ella a little today, did not take away from his party at school, or at the Karate Class. We are trying so hard to make sure that Josh isn't left behind in this process, it just left me feeling like I am doing this wrong. But how do you do Family Cancer Survival right? There is no handbook on getting your family through this without any damage. Lord knows I would have been at Barnes and Noble to buy a few copies by Day 2. All I can do pray, do my best and pray a little more.
Ella and Steve at Ella's 4th Birthday


  1. ARE doing a great job! I only have one child at this point, but from what I have read and heard, you love each of your children uniquely for who they are. Things in this life will be different for each of them and you will love each of them just as unconditionally but you'll give them each what they need...and these needs will be different. You're an amazing mom who celebrated her daughter with excitement yesterday, and who will excitedly celebrate with Josh this weekend! Your children have amazing parents...don't forget that!

  2. You are an awesome Mom. Don't doubt yourself, it's an ongoing lifelong learning process. Let Josh know that you will mark his 1/2 birthday when the time comes too!! It's a wonderful celebration, I love this idea!!!