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Sunday, December 25, 2011

Christmas 2011

Merry Christmas.
Ella woke up with a fever of 104 on Christmas Eve, so we where admitted to Loyola around 9am.  I woke up Josh to let him know that Ella had to go to the hospital. He asked me if she had to be there for Christmas, and when I told him yes he began crying. He went downstairs and did his best to make her laugh while we were packing up her bags.
They ran blood work and took a chest X-Ray. Her weight is down about a pound from last week at clinic and her ANC is still about 580. Her fever ranged from 102-104 all day long. Even when they got her on Tylenol, her fever never got under control. Around 6pm last night they told us that they were able to verify that she has C-Diff and 2 virus'. The C-Diff she got the last time they gave her 2 rounds of heavy duty antibiotics, just like this. This time she also has virus' that are keeping the fever from going anywhere.
The hospital staff was really great about trying to make Christmas special for her. We wrote a letter to Santa and left cookies with milk for him last night.
We tracked him on our computer through the night. She had to wake up ever 4 hours for Tylenol and every 6 for antibiotics for the C-Diff, then another 4 hours to check her vitals and temperature. Unfortunately these times did not join up at all, so she was up about every 2 hours. Around midnight I told her all I wanted for Christmas was for her fever to go away. She told me to leave a note for Santa, so I wrote one and sat it next to hers. Sometime between 2 and 4 am Santa left packages for Ella and a few for Josh in her room. She woke up around 4am and couldn't fall back to sleep. She saw the packages, but she felt so icky that she didn't even get excited about them.
Steve, Josh and Aunt Carrie came up to the hospital around 8:30am and we opened gifts and ate breakfast together. Every year we take a funny face picture for Christmas. here is our picture for this year:

Her fever still isn't under control. It was back to 104 at 6pm tonight. they just switched her meds again to try to get it down. She will not be coming home until her fever breaks, because they are worried about dehydration. As long as her ANC stays about 500 she should be able to recover from the virus'.

I'm torn between being grateful and grumpy. On one hand I am grateful that we were all together and that Ella is here for me to even worry about. I know other parents that would be happy to have their child back for Christmas. I am grateful for friends and family who have reached out to support our family. I am grateful for the hospital staff that is caring for my baby. I am grumpy that our family could not spend Christmas together. Half of my family and my heart are still up at the hospital right now. I am mad that cancer took away the joy of going to church and spending Christmas day together at home in out PJ's. I am mad that the gifts are still under the tree and that I left Ella crying at the hospital today.

I will update as soon as something changes. Merry Christmas everyone.

1 comment:

  1. Katie, I'm so so sorry this is happening.. It's heartbreaking to read your post, and I cannot imagine how much more difficult it is to live it. You, Ella, Josh and Steve are in our prayers... Stay strong, you are loved by so many!