Sunday, August 29, 2010
Day Five-Chemo is working
Ella is nauseous and threw up last night. They put her on an IV to keep her hydrated, and she slept so hard we had to change her PJ's 3 times because they were wet. I guess the chemo is working.
I went to pick up the start of the prescription she will have to have daily for the next two years. The pharmacist asked me if she has any major medical conditions. I replied "Besides the Cancer?" I guess I was assuming he should know by the stack of scripts I laid down next to him.
Steve is with her as she sleeps at the hospital. She is an expert all the games marked for 4 yr olds in the kids room. She is wearing a purple tutu today and an IV. We have names the IV pole since it has to go everywhere with us. We have aslo assigned a stuffed animal to sit on top of it.
I am sure all mothers do this, or would do this if they were in my shoes, but when they told us it might be Leukemia- I prayed. I asked God to please let me switch places with her. Please let me be the one that has to go through cancer and chemo treatments- not my baby girl. Let me be the one to vomit and lose my hair- not my baby girl. Let me be the one to lose the next 2 years because I'm too sick to go to school or play with my friends- not my baby girl. My 4 year old baby girl.
How do you tell your 4 year old, that loves to wear nail polish and put piggies in her hair- that she is going to lose her hair? It's not fair. I hate it and it's not fair. Cancer Sucks. First it took over one of my best friends lives- now my babies. Today- I'm pissed. Why can't life be fair?
As soon as she is better we are taking her back to her favorite place- Myrtle Beach. Hell, everyone can come.